“You’re fat”


How can you be Paleo? You’re kind of big…

Of course I knew that I would eventually get this question asked. It was expected, especially when starting my own personal chef business. Truth is, I didn’t cut out the bullshit to become skinny. I did it to feel better, and that was my only goal.

Granted, there are a shit ton of Paleo authors,and bloggers who are thin,but some people can’t fathom the fact that they were thin to begin with. Whatever the case might be,every single person is different. I’m the type of person who condones being different. You won’t find my ass following a crowd!

Now I bring up this subject today for a reason, I’m dealing with my daughter being bullied because she’s on the thick side. Mind you, she’s dropped 3 pant sizes in the last few months, but to some asshole kid…that information is irrelevant.

I don’t understand why, as human beings we have to put ourselves in a category of “skinny” or “fat”. In fact, I hate that word “fat”, unless I’m eating it, it doesn’t belong in our mouths.

“You’re fat”

What the fuck does that mean?
People have fat, it doesn’t define them as to what they are. This kid who’s picking on my daughter is hairy as a yeti… Do we call him hair?

I’m saying this because it’s time we stop saying this about ourselves, and about each other. It’s fucking stupid. We are all beautiful in one way or another.

Now to go inside my daughter’s school to scare the shit out of this boy.

She won’t say “fuck you,asshole” like I told her to. The school knows me, the administration fears me.
I don’t fuck around.

So remember ladies and gents,
Nobody is defined by their pant size.
They should be defined by their accomplishments and shit.

Get it together America. Because this is bullshit!


“You’re not perfect”


You act like you’re perfect,but you’re not!

Ahhhh words of probably every single hater I’ve ever had since starting Paleo. Talk about how shitty of a person I am to preach Paleo but still eat that random taco from time to time. What an asshole to judge me for eating a taco from time to time.

Being Paleo is never striving to be perfect…we don’t live to criticize someone on what they eat. We merely tell them to cut the bullshit so they won’t be sick. Granted, I’ve been sick lately, thyroid is acting like a complete bitch, pain is back. But then again should I be surprised? I ate that gluten free ciabatta bread like my life depended on it at Trader Joes. I feel like shit when I wake up at times, not surprised when I do in fact eat one of the best fucking tacos in this city.

Why on earth would I deprive myself of a taco? It’s just a taco, he didn’t do anything to me.

Now, don’t go off eating like a stupid bastard and say “well PMF told me it was okay , so…”. One of the wisest women I know said it the best ” pale-you” (www.paleochef.com)and that my friends is what you should remember. Paleo isn’t an all fits one type shit. There is some people who can tolerate things that others can’t. In the end it’s really about listening to our bodies.

Giving a fuck about what some dumbass says about you not being perfect is a crock of shit. Especially while they hold a bottle of big red in one hand and ramen noodles in the other.

Uhhh no. I may cheat, but I make sure the shit isn’t gonna kill me….ok that’s dramatic…maybe not kill me, but give me a serious case of runny butt. Don’t nobody like a runny butt.

I may not always cheat but when I do, I make sure it didn’t cost me a total of $1.89 and some water

So please guys don’t let a mungaloid make you feel less of a person because they know they can’t have the determination to do what you do.

It’s easy to cook that hamburger helper. It’s not so easy making a meal that doesn’t come from a box.

keep it thuggish,thuggish and toned
Pamela Martha Focker


PaleoFX 2014


I plan on getting totally kombucha wasted with my people.

PaleoFX, if you’re Paleo…then you’re there. I met so many new faces (because names I will never remember) and realized a couple of things:

1. I’m THE baby of Paleo blogging and I hate that shit.
2. Most Paleo bloggers envy the fact that I can say fuck more than once in a fucking sentence. <~ just like that.

So I decided that I would change those two things around.
I'm putting up recipes(even though I hate that shit),posting up material at least 2-3 times a week and starting a series…that may or may not be a long series depending on the feedback on it. It will be called "Tell me how you really feel" and I'll invite some awesome Paleo bloggers to tell me how they really feel about,well being a blogger,while totally being able to say shit,fuck,and douchebag.

I finally wanted to start a podcast… Because my voice needs to be heard. The airwaves should have me on it saying "fuck you gluten,you give me gas and I nearly shit myself" like every single day.
Am I right?

I want y'all's opinion. I have my own business and have a family, but will make an effort to make this happen.

Let me know bitches!

keep it thuggish,thuggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker

A pound of meat…mix and done.


We live in the times of cheap,fast and just gross…like your mother.

So in the past month people are all up in arms about “yoga mats and subway….blah blah blah”. Truth is that’s not the problem in today’s society.
Sure it’s fucked up that the government allows these ingredients in our food, but we have the choice to consume it.

I have a good pack of Paleo bloggers as friends (well known in the community) and I always hear the same things from their readers:

Your recipes are too hard for me

…the ingredients your recipe calls for are too expensive you should cater to people like me.


We live in a world of quick and easy but that’s exactly what has made us a generation of sick fuckers.

There was no such thing as quick and easy back in the days. You would have to get your bitch ass up and kill for your food.

If the box says: cheap,easy,or quick then it’s a cheap,easy and quick way to obtain diabetes.


So stop being little bitches about prices of ingredients and level of work you have to do to obtain a awesome sauce that is all natural and cheese free.
It’s tough to make recipes (which is why I haven’t done much of that lately) and pleasing everyone is just a huge bitch.
Too expensive?
Then you really don’t value your life ( not like how I value your life 😁)
Too hard?
It’s harder being sick,tired and stupid.

Why are you worried about eating yoga mats? You should be more worried that you can’t make yourself a sandwich,mungaloid!

Keep it thuggish thuggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker

Oh shit

2014-01-02 12.38.25

So I know we’ve been missed, sorry… with being consumed in building my own business and having people try to tell me how to run it… Kicking people’s asses does take up some time.

Ok so I wanted to make this post regarding another reason why I have been MIA:

I have some haters, gasp… yes haters. Apparently I sound like Thug Kitchen, never mind the fact that I’ve been cursing like a sailor since before it was considered badass…

Do I care? Fuck no. Do I want the bull shit to stop? Fuck yes.

I am not like thug kitchen, I am me. I curse at least once a day and no more than 10 minutes after waking up… seriously it’s a bitch finding your bra on in the dark.

I wish Thug Kitchen the best but bitch… eat some bacon, that’s why you are so angry.

Life isn’t complete unless you eat some bacon… can’t do that soy shit… crazy me, but I don’t like GMO bullshit ass food.


I noticed an influx of new views on here, it’s obviously for free tips and recipes for Paleo or whole30. I have posted a couple of recipes on here and plan on doing some more soon. Note the word “some”

I will give you one solid tip for going Paleo and/or Whole30:

Stay away from Wal-mart because it’s obvious they want to give you the shits.

Now let’s fuck up 2014

Keep it thuggish, ruggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker

Why are you so obsessed and shit?


Lose weight, feel great… see your toes and shit

Why in the fuck have we become a nation obsessed with the next diet fad?
Shouldn’t we be more concerned with the health of our kids rather than their weight?

Not all kids are created equal just as adults… my ass doesn’t look like yours. ..I have a pancake ass… yours is probably like a table or some shit.

We are programmed at a young age to “watch what you eat”, which wasn’t a bad Idea till the “low-fat” craze hit mainstream. Now you see bitches all on tv promoting low fat yogurt and fat free bullshit.

No, John Stamos, I don’t want your fucking yogurt, and Jaime, drink kombucha if your poop shoot isn’t working properly.

Long ago are the days of just shutting the fuck up and eating bacon, now it’s gotta be turkey bacon (wtf?) or Soy bacon (seriously WTF?).

“Beef is so fattening…I’ll take soy”

↑ seriously I’ve heard that too many times to count.

I just had to vent…

Keep it thuggish ruggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker

What the fucking fuck!


Oh I’ll just make some extra money to pay for crossfit, no big deal.

What a crock of shit,  seriously just shit.
So I’ve been MIA for months,  I’m sorry I have neglected you my little thuggsters.

Truth is, what I thought would be a small time gig of meal prepping for a few friends has turned into a company bigger than I ever knew was possible.

I went from meal prepping 45 meals to prepping over 300 in one day.

Now I can’t complain,  my main goal for starting all this shit was to bring awareness to people. Let them see how food really has an impact on your day to day living. 
You can either wake up feeling awesome after a 100% Paleo day or you can shit yourself after engulfing your face with nasty as fuck, McDonalds.

Your choice.


Mama is feeling neglected. My poor baby doesn’t get her picture taken as much. Oh but she lets me know that when she lays her 75 pound behemoth ass right on me.

I love what I do, I love making people happy.

In the end that makes it worth it.

Eat my food and don’t shit yourself.


Keep it thuggish ruggish and toned,

Pamela Martha Focker

Crossfitting beast! (for 2 whole months, don’t judge me)


Crossfit is a cult! A cult of fucking awesomeness!

Sorry I’ve been MIA I’ve been starting up a meal prep business, and believe me when I say, it’s busy as fuck.
I’m looking to open either a food truck and/or a store front. So keep a look out in the Pearland, Tx area for my food!


Wow two months in, I’ve never felt more amazing in my life. I would of never imagined a year ago I’d be here, clauses, and bruises galore! 
I went from being bedridden to cleaning, snatching and all that shit.

Here’s the funny part…I’ve lost weight. I know you’re probably thinking “well duh, ya dumbass”. The thing is that I’m having so much fun with crossfit that I forgot my goal of becoming healthy.


July 2012

So if you’re thinking of doing crossfit but you feel like it’s still too hard for you… think again. If my bitch ass can do it, your punk ass can do it.


(One month after starting crossfit) July 2013

Most amazing part of this kick ass journey, is that my daughter has developed the want and need to crossfit. Her dreams of becoming an Olympic lifter,attending AND winning the Crossfit games has been added to becoming a doctor. Shes amazing and first day of Xfit she was in complete beast mode. Now the problem with all this is she’s flexing the guns almost every 5 minutes.


Xfitting in Jordans...smh she's getting some nanos soon.

Before anyone asks I have no idea how much I’ve lost since first starting
Then again, I really don’t give a shit,  I feel good, and bust my ass 4 days a week to be an inspiration to many but more importantly my daughters.

I Crossfit for the future in my children, not to fit into a size 3 pants.


June 2013 before starting Crossfit, July one month in, August two months in.

Eat Paleo like you give a fuck about your life. Crossfit to live that life to the fullest.

Keep it thuggish, ruggish and toned,

Pamela Martha Focker