“You’re fat”

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How can you be Paleo? You’re kind of big…

Of course I knew that I would eventually get this question asked. It was expected, especially when starting my own personal chef business. Truth is, I didn’t cut out the bullshit to become skinny. I did it to feel better, and that was my only goal.

Granted, there are a shit ton of Paleo authors,and bloggers who are thin,but some people can’t fathom the fact that they were thin to begin with. Whatever the case might be,every single person is different. I’m the type of person who condones being different. You won’t find my ass following a crowd!

Now I bring up this subject today for a reason, I’m dealing with my daughter being bullied because she’s on the thick side. Mind you, she’s dropped 3 pant sizes in the last few months, but to some asshole kid…that information is irrelevant.

I don’t understand why, as human beings we have to put ourselves in a category of “skinny” or “fat”. In fact, I hate that word “fat”, unless I’m eating it, it doesn’t belong in our mouths.

“You’re fat”

What the fuck does that mean?
People have fat, it doesn’t define them as to what they are. This kid who’s picking on my daughter is hairy as a yeti… Do we call him hair?

I’m saying this because it’s time we stop saying this about ourselves, and about each other. It’s fucking stupid. We are all beautiful in one way or another.

Now to go inside my daughter’s school to scare the shit out of this boy.

She won’t say “fuck you,asshole” like I told her to. The school knows me, the administration fears me.
I don’t fuck around.

So remember ladies and gents,
Nobody is defined by their pant size.
They should be defined by their accomplishments and shit.

Get it together America. Because this is bullshit!

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“You’re not perfect”

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You act like you’re perfect,but you’re not!

Ahhhh words of probably every single hater I’ve ever had since starting Paleo. Talk about how shitty of a person I am to preach Paleo but still eat that random taco from time to time. What an asshole to judge me for eating a taco from time to time.

Being Paleo is never striving to be perfect…we don’t live to criticize someone on what they eat. We merely tell them to cut the bullshit so they won’t be sick. Granted, I’ve been sick lately, thyroid is acting like a complete bitch, pain is back. But then again should I be surprised? I ate that gluten free ciabatta bread like my life depended on it at Trader Joes. I feel like shit when I wake up at times, not surprised when I do in fact eat one of the best fucking tacos in this city.

Why on earth would I deprive myself of a taco? It’s just a taco, he didn’t do anything to me.

Now, don’t go off eating like a stupid bastard and say “well PMF told me it was okay , so…”. One of the wisest women I know said it the best ” pale-you” (www.paleochef.com)and that my friends is what you should remember. Paleo isn’t an all fits one type shit. There is some people who can tolerate things that others can’t. In the end it’s really about listening to our bodies.

Giving a fuck about what some dumbass says about you not being perfect is a crock of shit. Especially while they hold a bottle of big red in one hand and ramen noodles in the other.

Uhhh no. I may cheat, but I make sure the shit isn’t gonna kill me….ok that’s dramatic…maybe not kill me, but give me a serious case of runny butt. Don’t nobody like a runny butt.

I may not always cheat but when I do, I make sure it didn’t cost me a total of $1.89 and some water

So please guys don’t let a mungaloid make you feel less of a person because they know they can’t have the determination to do what you do.

It’s easy to cook that hamburger helper. It’s not so easy making a meal that doesn’t come from a box.

keep it thuggish,thuggish and toned
Pamela Martha Focker

🍞

PaleoFX 2014

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I plan on getting totally kombucha wasted with my people.

PaleoFX, if you’re Paleo…then you’re there. I met so many new faces (because names I will never remember) and realized a couple of things:

1. I’m THE baby of Paleo blogging and I hate that shit.
2. Most Paleo bloggers envy the fact that I can say fuck more than once in a fucking sentence. <~ just like that.

So I decided that I would change those two things around.
I'm putting up recipes(even though I hate that shit),posting up material at least 2-3 times a week and starting a series…that may or may not be a long series depending on the feedback on it. It will be called "Tell me how you really feel" and I'll invite some awesome Paleo bloggers to tell me how they really feel about,well being a blogger,while totally being able to say shit,fuck,and douchebag.

I finally wanted to start a podcast… Because my voice needs to be heard. The airwaves should have me on it saying "fuck you gluten,you give me gas and I nearly shit myself" like every single day.
Am I right?

I want y'all's opinion. I have my own business and have a family, but will make an effort to make this happen.

Let me know bitches!

keep it thuggish,thuggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker

A pound of meat…mix and done.

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We live in the times of cheap,fast and just gross…like your mother.

So in the past month people are all up in arms about “yoga mats and subway….blah blah blah”. Truth is that’s not the problem in today’s society.
Sure it’s fucked up that the government allows these ingredients in our food, but we have the choice to consume it.

I have a good pack of Paleo bloggers as friends (well known in the community) and I always hear the same things from their readers:

Your recipes are too hard for me

…the ingredients your recipe calls for are too expensive you should cater to people like me.

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We live in a world of quick and easy but that’s exactly what has made us a generation of sick fuckers.

There was no such thing as quick and easy back in the days. You would have to get your bitch ass up and kill for your food.

If the box says: cheap,easy,or quick then it’s a cheap,easy and quick way to obtain diabetes.

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So stop being little bitches about prices of ingredients and level of work you have to do to obtain a awesome sauce that is all natural and cheese free.
It’s tough to make recipes (which is why I haven’t done much of that lately) and pleasing everyone is just a huge bitch.
Too expensive?
Then you really don’t value your life ( not like how I value your life 😁)
Too hard?
It’s harder being sick,tired and stupid.

Why are you worried about eating yoga mats? You should be more worried that you can’t make yourself a sandwich,mungaloid!

Keep it thuggish thuggish and toned

Pamela Martha Focker